Notes from the TEFL Graveyard

Wistful reflections, petty glories.

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Location: The House of Usher, Brazil

I'm a flailing TEFL teacher who entered the profession over a decade ago to kill some time whilst I tried to find out what I really wanted to do. I like trying to write comedy (I once got to the semi-finals of a BBC Talent competition, ironically writing a sitcom based on TEFL), whilst trying to conquer genetically inherited procrastination... I am now based in Brazil, where I live with my wife and two chins.

Friday, 2 October 2009

É NÓS!!!!!!!

I can barely control my bladder with the excitement of finding out that Rio de Janeiro will be hosting the Olympics in 2016. That'll be a football World Cup in 2014 and an Olympics two years later, with non-stop samba in between.

Big winners? Lula, who will no doubt use this as a victory for his government. Politicians and construction company owners (often the politicians' brothers-in-law) who will be already totting up just how much they can overcharge and what this amount will buy in country mansions, good snuff and bikini-clad teenagers. Pelé, who has finally got a call right, after never managing to predict the correct result of a World Cup since he last played in one. And the drug lords in Rio, who will no doubt be offered unofficial "concessions" in exchange for being good boys during the event.

And, last but not least, Paulo Coelho, a somewhat unexpected inclusion in the Olympic delegation, but who may now be remembered for something other than his books and his claims to be a wizard.

É bonita, é bonita, e é bonita!

Here is a video of Gonzaguinha doing an impression of legendary football star and philosopher, Socrates.

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6 Comments:

Blogger Gadjo Dilo said...

And I sincerely hope that you, personally, will also be able to cash in on all this, perhaps by providing translation services to the transexual prostitutes in every language used by the amassed Olympic delegates!

(I'm only 3 degrees of separation from Pelé - can anybody beat that?)

4 October 2009 at 05:58  
Blogger Gyppo Byard said...

Congratulations to a worthy winner. I'm glad that South America is to have its first Olympics. Seems only fair. Also, every Olympics is surrounded by dodgy construction, rampant corruption and finger-pointing. So it seems right and fair that we should give the opportunity to a country which excels in these areas.

Gadj - can't do Pele, but I once held a door open for Paul Daniels.

4 October 2009 at 09:09  
Blogger No Good Boyo said...

Congrats, it'll be good to see the Olympics go south for once. If the Greeks managed to sort things out, despite centuries of arse-elbow mislocation, then the Riparians haev a literally fighting chance.

Please passo on the best wishes of the Welsh people to every Brazilian you meet.

5 October 2009 at 11:36  
Blogger M C Ward said...

Thanks, gents, I shall pass on your collective congratulations to the natives, which may take some explaining. But I'm sure it'll be worth the effort.

Gdj, I'm impressed by your 3 degrees stuff. Half the number it normally takes, according to some loon.

5 October 2009 at 23:09  
Anonymous サイドビジネス said...

1日5万円~が手に入るサイドビジネスのご案内です。男狂いのセレブ女性はネットで知り合った男を次々に金の力で食い散らかしています。そんな女性を手玉にとって大金を稼いでみませんか

29 November 2009 at 22:18  
Blogger M C Ward said...

Unversed as I am in your language, if this is an offer to vastly increase the size of my penis, please URGENTLY RE-POST IN ENGLISH.

30 November 2009 at 17:38  

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