Notes from the TEFL Graveyard

Wistful reflections, petty glories.

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Location: The House of Usher, Brazil

I'm a flailing TEFL teacher who entered the profession over a decade ago to kill some time whilst I tried to find out what I really wanted to do. I like trying to write comedy (I once got to the semi-finals of a BBC Talent competition, ironically writing a sitcom based on TEFL), whilst trying to conquer genetically inherited procrastination... I am now based in Brazil, where I live with my wife and two chins.

Thursday 16 October 2008

USING ALCOHOL TO MOVE FORWARD

We've just had to change our car, something that younger men in baseball hats tend to get misty-eyed about, but a situation I find somewhat galling. Cars are simply a drain on one's meagre income in my view, nowhere more so than in Brazil, where prices are inflated to ridiculous levels by government taxes, which go towards funding wealthy lifestyles for politicians and their huge extended families.

One thing that has slightly reduced the financial abyss into which changing our vehicle has plunged us is the fact that our new motor runs on both petrol (gasoline (US)) and alcohol. At last I've found a use for the bottles of local "wine" I've received over the years.

A litre of alcohol is 45% the price of a litre of petrol, so we'll definitely economise. However, engines use more alcohol than petrol to cover the same distance, meaning that we're filling up every two days, instead of every four as before.

Normally I fill up at night after my classes, always at the same petrol station to get the best deal. I'm only hoping that my sudden appearance twice as often as before won't be misinterpreted by the monosyllabic pump attendant, in scenes reminiscent of those here:


8 Comments:

Blogger Well-lighted Shadows said...

great vid...missing the old country then? At least if you break down you´ll be able to have a quick snifter.

18 October 2008 at 04:58  
Blogger Ms Scarlet said...

Maybe you should get the monosyllabic pump attendant to sign up for a class?
BTW I love Ted and Ralph.
Sx

18 October 2008 at 11:12  
Blogger Kevin Musgrove said...

Having to go to the off-licence three or four times a week to buy enough cheap alcohol to fill a petrol tank? Why it's just like being back over here!

18 October 2008 at 22:04  
Blogger M C Ward said...

Yep, SBM, I'm looking forward to having to siphon off some fuel in an emergency.

Miss Blue, I appreciate the suggestion, but I need a monsyllabic pump attendant as a student like I need a cattle prod near my udders. Ted and Ralph are legendary, as is Bob Fleming and his dry cough.

Indeed Kevin, plus ça change and all that...

20 October 2008 at 10:43  
Blogger Gadjo Dilo said...

If that's exactly 2 days and exactly 4 days then you're making a slight saving on the alcohol, I think. And you could make it at home, surely!

Ahh, now I know what the clip is but I still can't see it! (Speakers not connected yet). I love them too - legendary.

21 October 2008 at 05:30  
Blogger No Good Boyo said...

The burgers of Llanelli run their cars, like their digestive tracts, on chip fat. It's true:

http://www.walesonline.co.uk/
news/uk-news/
page.cfm?objectid
=12265367&method
=full&siteid=50082

25 October 2008 at 21:40  
Blogger Gyppo Byard said...

Mr Ward - I have tagged you. Rules on my blog.

26 October 2008 at 06:14  
Blogger M C Ward said...

How fitting, NGB!

27 October 2008 at 09:51  

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