Notes from the TEFL Graveyard

I'm tempting fate with this one, but I really am quite busy. Good luck! Move to a Third World country ; Cry yourself to sleep for the first six years as a penniless TEFL teacher ; In desperation, try to learn to become a Web Developer ; Give up trying to become a Web Developer ; Listen to your wife’s suggestion to use the skills you already have, instead of bumbling around trying to learn new ones * – then stubbornly ignore it; Try to become a Web Developer again; Give up trying to become a Web Developer again and return to point 2; Decide to use the skills you already have, instead of bumbling around trying to learn new ones – and pretend it was all your idea ; Become a translator and charge just below global market rates ; Sit back and enjoy profiting from the economic chaos that has engulfed the planet and turned exchange rates in your favour, like a Bond villain, or summat ; * Expletives removed for the sake of human decency.

I have to admit that, over the years, I have developed a robust loathing of banks , perhaps because my late father, and his late brother, both worked for one, neither of them ever having a good word to say about them. Towards the end of my father’s career, bank employees went from being administrators of customers’ finances to being salespeople , something he simply couldn’t abide. Elderly customers always sought him out for his wisdom, patience and genuine credibility, and this relationship of trust was totally undermined by his being expected to sell them something at every opportunity, he felt. His exasperation grew as he neared retirement, to the point that, in one of those horrible motivational meetings only the David Ickes of this world can possibly find uplifting , the manager goaded staff that they simply weren’t selling enough insurance. “ [Name of high-street bank] makes enough bloody profit as it is!” my father protested, taking the stand that I think I still most admire h...