Skip to main content

GORDON'S ALIVE...

Keen-eyed readers who popped by in around June may remember a garbled message I posted (and swiftly deleted) relating to some fairly major legal difficulties I was facing, which, thankfully, turned out to be utterly baseless.

Without wishing to go into the morbid details, suffice it to say that our attempts to adopt a young waif led to a rumour circulating in the region that there was a German child trafficker at large - and I'm still not sure which part of that double insult riled me more. I am delighted to say I have been fully cleared of all suspicions, with my moral integrity and island heritage more or less intact. What it has provided me with is yet another demonstration of the depth of the other-planetary madness by which this country operates, where criminals (and clowns, in the literal sense of the word) are routinely elected to public office, and people hoping to adopt an abandoned child are criminalised. And people wonder why Brazil's attempts to secure a permanent seat on the UN Security Council have come to naught as the battled-hardened troops fresh from peacekeeping in Haiti rumble into the Morro do Alemão in Rio, the drug traffickers having already left via the sewage system.

So, I'm gingerly dipping my toes back into the blogalaxy, fresh from a bout of chickenpox that has left my rugged features slightly more bullet-ridden and interesting.

More soon...

Comments

Anonymous said…
Yay! Well done you for not getting screwed!

Ex-pats who think they have 'gone native' and who shirk other ex-pats or who want you to know that they know the host country better than other ex-pats are a pain in the arse, as are ex-pats who are still too tied to the homeland. The ones in the middle can be great, though, and much nicer than if you'd met them in the homeland.

engelsk
Ms Scarlet said…
You're back!!
This is a complicated question as I don't know any ex-pats. But I have moved from the south-east to the south west and have embraced all things rural... supping milk straight from the cow and that sort of thing... so I suppose I would be an ex-pat bore.
Sx
M C Ward said…
Thanks Eng. I fully agree with your neat summary of ex-patitude.

Scarlet, nice to see you again. I presume you mean you decant the milk before drinking it "straight from the cow", otherwise you may well be spurned by the local community and/or arrested :)
Gadjo Dilo said…
Blimey, Wardo, mistaken for a Gerry, eh? Well done on getting that legal stuff sorted - and on the highly commendable reason for it all. Have a great 2011.
M C Ward said…
Thanks Gadj - hope you have a good one too. How's the new job going (probably not at all new now - I haven't been out much).

And being confused with the Hun certainly was a dastardly business.
glad to have you back, I was in your neck of the woods, Sao Paolo, just last week
M C Ward said…
Nice to hear from you, Spesh. What were you doing in SP? Business or pleasure? You picked a time of torrential rains, but I guess you're kind of used to that ;) If you look even vaguely German, be extra vigilant...
Actually I was there visiting a lady friend. Well I look like the typical Alemao tall, fairish with glasses. I had no probs though, even though I was staying in the centre and walked from Augusta through Crakolandia at night. Mind you I was really keeping an eye out. Liked SP but doenst have the green spaces of BA.
all the best mate, write us smth!

Popular posts from this blog

FOOLING WITH SCHOOLING

One of the commonest figures to be found within TEFL is the aspiring administrator. This is a teacher who, often drained by years of repetitive, poorly remunerated clowning around in the classroom, seeks a position managing other teachers, such as Director of Studies (aptly and attractively known as "Doss"), from which they can sit in an imaginary TEFL director’s chair smoking a cigar, bellowing, “CUT!” and enjoying not having to pull a linguistic rabbit out of a hat twelve times a day, five days a week. I include myself within this TEFL subgenre, although my past experiences of administration have left me with an odd yearning to get back into the classroom and be king of my own modest sandcastle. In 2005, whilst I was working in HR at a local factory, my Brazilian friend Bert and I decided to start our own school. I had recently managed to wriggle out of a honey trap I’d set for myself, when I offered to give a free English course to my colleagues in the factory’s Training a...

I AM OFFICIALLY A TIT

Show recently extracted the wind from my sails with typically well-intentioned down-to-earthism. Armed with several diagrams and a kitchen knife , she extolled her opinion that I should concentrate on doing what I can do and stop fannying around trying to learn how to do things I can’t , in yet another feeble-minded attempt to divorce myself from TEFL. Yet again, I believe her to be right. It all started back in May, when I went to Poland with my male voice choir and on the plane to Frankfurt found myself sitting next to Jetro, one of our second tenors. I’d never really spoken to him before, but during the trip I discovered that he ran a small yet growing Internet company , an online system through which owners of used car dealerships could manage their businesses. He explained how previously he’d been something of a factotum, working around the country in various jobs and starting various businesses, until he discovered that he could neither work for somebody nor manage others –...

NO MORE A-CUSSIN'

In an effort to rid himself of the habit of using foul language at the slightest provocation , a Facebook chum recently asked for suggestions for harmless expressions he could use in front of his Gran and her bingo clique during moments of high stress, astonishment and/or extreme disappointment. I weighed in with, " Crikey! " and, " Great Scott! " Please feel free to add your suggestions, and help to make the world a tiny bit less like a trucker's stopover in Eindhoven .